Yeh! Your child is now a teenager. It’s time to vary your parenting style.
Yes, your teenagers are possibly moodier now than they were when they were younger. And you have new things to ponder, such as hangouts, dating, dressing, and friends who make you uncomfortable.
Without mincing words, your teenager will push you beyond limits and test your patience. But they are still your children. And, even if they won’t admit it, they still need you.
The key is knowing which efforts are worthwhile and which are not.
Therefore, avoid making specific parenting mistakes at this phase.
6 Mistakes Parents must Avoid
Extreme and Lack of discipline:
Some parents, being scared of their teenagers pushing them away, avoid discipline. They think it is okay to allow them to have their way.
These parents’ teenagers do whatever they want.
They are conscious that they will either not get punished for their wrong or receive only light discipline.
Such parents neither discipline nor correct their teens.
Other parents are concerned that their teenagers are out of control. They take it seriously.
Teenagers raised by such parents face extreme discipline.
Such teens struggle to make decisions for fear of making mistakes. They cannot seek advice from their parents for fear of their unknown reaction.
Extreme or too little discipline is a mistake to avoid in parenting.
It’s about finding a balance on how to discipline your teenager.
See Also Difficult Teenager; How to discipline a difficult teenager
Setting up family values and culture will help your teenager grow into an admirable adult.
Embarrassment in public places
Parenting a teenager is a whole lot. Teenagers try out new things based on what they see and feel. As such, you may find them in states that are very unpleasant to you.
Your teenager is trying to build around friends. Everyone wants to be accepted. Embarrassment makes them unable to lift their heads high among peers.
Public embarrassment not just makes them shy but reduces their self-esteem.
As parents, avoid the mistake of embarrassing your teenager in public places.
Undermining their opinions
Although they are teenagers, they are brimming with ideas and inventions. It is incorrect to reject their ideas and suggestions because you believe they are too young.
Teenagers have many ideas running through their heads. When your teenager shares an opinion with you, do not dismiss or disregard it.
It makes them see themselves as not being resourceful. When a teenager comes up with an idea, ask questions about how they intend to accomplish it.
Probing questions can help your teenager learn if the idea is attainable.
Avoid the mistake of dismissing their opinions. It bridges the communication gap between teens and parents.
See Also Parenting Teenagers; 5 Amazing Tips you Must Know
Too careful and Fearful
Since parenting teenagers is difficult, parents in this period become too fearful and careful.
They conceive of wrong happening to their teenager. Fear of joining a dreadful group. The fear of not obeying their instructions.
Parents get the urge to assist their teenagers. It emanates from the fearful heart.
It makes teenagers lose out on opportunities to learn something new and valuable.
Sometimes parents do not want their teens to fail, so they try to render help.
As parents, allow your teenagers to fail when they try things.
Worrying over minor issues
Your teenager is your child and needs care. There is no need to be overprotective of your teenager.
It is not necessary to beat yourself up over minor issues.
Yes, your teenager would likely dress up in a certain way. You do not have to keep stressing over the outfit.
When your teenager’s behaviour does not pose harm to anyone, kindly overlook it.
Avoidance of minor issues creates a gap in communication and correction in parenting.
Ignoring major problems
While it’s okay to ignore minor issues, ignoring serious problems is dangerous.
Particularly, one that can hurt both the teenager and those around.
Teenage years call for close observation.
As parents, when you notice a sudden change in behaviour of your teen. It can be a sign of a major problem.
Some signs of major problems;
- Missing items at home.
- Teenagers returning with gifts from unexplained friends.
- Missing drugs at home, especially Cough syrup
- Sneaking out to see friends.
- Lying
- Sudden poor academic performance